We all have things in our past that we would like to change or do differently. When I was single, I was in a ladies bible study that I dearly loved. I made some good friends from that study. I even found my last roommate from that study. We really only knew each other within that group, but when I needed to move, she offered me a room in her home as her youngest daughter was going to be gone for the summer. We hit it off very well... until my intended DH entered the picture.
My roommate said she had bad feelings about my DH when he had been picked up on a body bond on child support... which only means the judge wanted to see him... and nothing else. He had a $1000 encumbrance on back child support... and I had it and paid it. We had only been dating for 6 weeks when it happened. He gave me back my money the next day. And my roommate told me that I should not have helped him. But I am getting ahead of myself here.
We had a mutual friend from this bible study... her name is Jane. This person has had some serious hurts in her life... and I have tried to support her and be a friend. (She has lost jobs and family and good friends because she has a chronic issue of lying.) She started thru a period of depression... and after many calls and text messages asking her to go and get help and go on anti-depressants... I had enough of the "I don't care anymore" thing... and recognized it for what it was... wanting attention. I decided that I didn't want to feed into that anymore... I had called her twice and left messages and had gotten no response. So... I decided that I was done and wasn't going to play that game.
About 3 weeks after that decision... my roommate asked me if I had heard from Jane lately. I told her that, "No, I hadn't, I called her twice and got no response." That was all I had said. My roommate went on to her own Tuesday study, and I went on about my business. I later got the first of many mean and nasty text messages from Jane. I have never answered any of them. I have ignored her messages. When word got out that DH and I were going to get married... the messages increased... she wanted to come to my wedding. (And I was being rude and ignoring her... DUH!) She even sent me a text message at 2 am on my wedding day... knowing it would wake me up!
She has called me names... insisted that I was a liar, that I was a nasty person and now I am two faced. These messages always come at night or early in the day. I want to be able to block her... but you cannot block a number on a cell phone. And I should change my number... but it's my number and the people that I want to have it... have it... with the exception of Jane... who I am wishing had never had it!
I haven't been in touch with certain people from my old church... and when I think about it... I am in contact with almost all the people who were at our wedding. I received a "forward email" this week... entitled Tequila and Salt... and one of the lines of the email said... when someone you know hates you for no reason, it's likely that they want to be like you. I can only believe that is what is happening in this situation. I have the one thing that Jane craves and desires... a husband who loves me for me. He doesn't see my outside... he sees my inside and that is what he loves... and respects, because he knows that I love him with all my heart. So for now, I will continue to ignore the text messages and try to not let it hurt my heart. My friend N. told me, you know who you are... and it's not what Jane is telling you. I do know who I am... I just need a thicker skin!